


I won't give up

by PerriewinkleNerdie



Category: Open Heart (Visual Novel)
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-12
Updated: 2019-09-12
Packaged: 2020-10-17 09:00:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,913
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20618423
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PerriewinkleNerdie/pseuds/PerriewinkleNerdie
Summary: Chapter 12 from his perspective with additional scenes





	I won't give up

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, hello, hello!   
So, this is a more or less take on chapter 12 from Ethan’s point of view, I’ve sprinkled a few other things in there, including the idea of something happening with Naveen and Ethan going to find MC, but is unable find her so he asks Sienna and she tells him she’s fired).  
Enjoy! <3

Ethan was in a dark place for the past few days. With the devastating news of Naveen having only a month to live, his own wellbeing was put aside.

Claire tried to talk to him on multiple occasions, but he wouldn’t even let her say a word.

He failed them. He failed them both. The man who became a father figure for him, and a woman who managed to break down the walls he spent years on building and steal his heart. He would never admit it to anyone, but his feelings for his Rookie were growing, getting more and more intense every day.

He swore he would never get himself in a situation like this again. Harper and he didn’t work out for multiple reasons, one of which being that she became his superior.

He knew how messy it could get. That’s why when he noticed how his eyes were unable to look away when Claire was in the room, how his heart beat faster when she was close, he decided that he would not act on his feelings, no matter how hard and painful that would be.

And then, Miami happened. When he brought her with him, it hasn’t even crossed his mind that something like… _this _would happen.

Something so heated, so passionate, so intimate, so _right_. His pulse quickened with a single thought of her in that dress.

It was almost as though his body had a mind of its own, the feeling of her delicate figure pressed against him in a heated passion, the picture of her face, flushed, moaning with pleasure stuck in his mind, never to let him forget about it, no matter how hard he tried.

He barely stopped himself that night. He foolishly let himself believe that one kiss would be enough to satiate his want, his need, that the longing in his heart and soul would be cured with just one taste of her.

Now, he felt stupid. He should have known that it would not be enough. After all, an addict doesn’t end his addiction with “just one time”.

After that, he was trying to keep his distance, not letting her get close, but she managed to do it anyway. Working on Naveen’s case together made it impossible for him to stay away.

She pulled him into the supply closet and his mind was suddenly frozen, unable to do anything.

And then once more, in the lab. She asked him for his honesty about them and his feelings. He wanted to give her the answers she wanted, the answers she deserved.

The problem was, he didn’t know _what_ to say. All he was feeling was longing, want and need to be close, and the pain of being unable to do so.

Then the whole situation with Mrs. Martinez. He didn’t know what she planned, what she did, but the old lady improved and who was he to deny her happiness after so many years of loneliness and pain?

The party was a great idea, even if only to see the smile on Teresa’s face.

And Rookie. She always seemed to be close by. He was standing next to her, both of them watching Mrs. Martinez say goodbye, telling her stories.

Claire chose him to go walk their favorite ex-patient out. He was surprised, fighting the smile that threatened to break out on his face.

“Play nice with Dr. Herondale, Ethan, dear. You’re lucky to have her.” She said, a knowing smile on her face.

“What? I mean… She’s…” was it really that obvious? Could everyone see just how much he cared for her?

“Pick your jaw off the floor, Dr. Ramsey. A handsome face like that shouldn’t look like a fish.” That woman was teasing him, knowing damn well what was going on in his mind.

“Now go on. Get outta here. Don’t let me see your face here again, understood?”

“Understood, Ethan.” She hugged him, then Claire, whispering something in her ear, a bright grin on her face.

They were standing side by side, watching Mrs. Martinez depart, when he felt her fingers grazing his, softly and tentatively lacing them together. He moved his thumb over her hand, cherishing the silent moment of closeness.

They talked for a moment longer before he had to get back to his duties. She asked him if he saw something special in her too. _What a stupid question_. He tried resisting a smile, but lost that fight, letting it break through before going back inside.

\----------

It took Claire a few weeks and devastating news to confess what her plan was with Mrs. Martinez. He could see it very clearly, the guilt, stress and pain eating her alive.

He needed to relax and just feel; he knew she needed it too. So, he invited her to see the opera with him.

She appreciated his gesture, saying how special she felt. He responded, not thinking too much about it, that he often donated his seats, to which she replied that she won’t feel special.

_Nonsense. You are special, you should know that._

That’s exactly what he told her, granted, in other words, but he wanted to subtly point it out that she was special. To him she was.

Using his ability to speak Italian he began translating and narrating the story for her, leaning close, his voice quiet and delicate.

He looked at her, seeing a tear trail down her cheek.

“Claire? Are you alright?” he leaned even closer to her, concern surely visible on his face. He raised his hand to her cheek, wiping the tear gently.

Her finger brushed the side of his hand and he looked at her, conflicted, but turned his hand to meet hers. Interlacing their fingers, holding tight.

“What happens next?” she asked, and he wasn’t sure if she meant the opera or the two of them. Swallowing hard, he continued, his voice soft and clear. The story was an emotionally driven piece. There was just something about the fact that two main characters got together eventually that made him feel down. The realization that he might not be so lucky hitting him hard as his thoughts involuntarily ran towards the woman beside him. He could feel a single tear forming in the corner of his eye, wiping it with his finger. The side of his face got warm suddenly. Claire was watching him.

She made the decision so fast that he was sure she didn’t even think before doing it.

Her lips pressed against his, an applause roaring, darkness surrounding them. He pressed his lips harder to hers, feeling the ache of need that has been neglected for too long. Realizing what they were doing, he turned away from her.

“Claire…”

“I’m sorry, I…” he saw her stand up and move to the railing, her shoulders low, her head hanging down with shame. His legs moved before his mind registered the decision to do so.

He stood behind her, close enough to feel the scent of her perfume.

“You know how complicated it is.” He whispered, pain in his voice, in his chest and on his face.

Claire turned around and he looked at her, pleading her with his eyes. But what exactly was he pleading her for?

“It’s not complicated, Ethan. Not for me.” There was sincerity in her voice. She believed what she was saying with every fiber of her whole being.

His hand raised again, brushing a lingering tear from the corner of her eye. She leaned into his touch, closing her eyes, savoring the feeling while it lasted.

He was losing. It was almost as if he was hanging on the edge of the cliff, his hand the only thing that kept him attached to the stones, and he could feel his grip loosening, threatening to let go any second.

He looked at her, hanging on to the last slip of self-control he had, and he felt his fingers let go of the edge.

“Dammit, Claire…”

He gave in, gripped her head and pulled her back against him, her back pressed softly to the railing, kissing her tenderly.

His fingers ran over her hair, twisting the strands in between them. She wound her arms around his waist, bringing him closer to her, closing any gaps, leaving no space between them.

The lights came back on and they pulled away, looking into each other’s eyes. Hers expressed the longing she’s been feeling, and he was sure the hunger that has taken over his mind was visible in his.

“Come on. I… I should drive you home.” And with a grim look on his face he guided her out of his private booth. Neither said a word.

\------------

The next day was one of the worst days of his life. He couldn’t do it. All this time, all the things he did, it was all for nothing.

Naveen was dying. And he had a month to live.

He felt like a walking disappointment. Claire found him in one of the halls leading to his office. She had a terrified look on her face, fear in her eyes. She asked for his help, but he couldn’t bring himself to do that. He was so afraid of disappointing her too, that all he did was give her the news about Naveen.

And then he slammed the door in her face. Closing himself off to the possibility of her helping him.

That was the last time he would see her for the next few days, their schedules making it impossible for him to catch even a glimpse of her.

Meanwhile, he continued his tests on Naveen, looking for answers, more desperate than ever. He saw some improvement in his results, a glimmer of hope shining through.

That was all he needed to want to find Claire, have something positive to share with her, have the opportunity to apologize for his poor and unacceptable behavior.

But she was nowhere to be found. He looked everywhere, but she just wasn’t there, almost as if she disappeared.

He decided that he had one shot at finding her.

“Can I speak with you, Dr. Trinh?”

They moved away from the prying eyes and ears of the bystanders.

“Yes?”

“Do you know where Cla… Dr. Herondale is? I cannot find her, and I have an urgent matter to talk over with her.”

“Oh, Dr. Ramsey… you don’t know?” her face fell.

“Know what?”

“Claire was fired yesterday.” And just like that, the world has stopped.

“_What? Why?”_

“The Martinez family sued the hospital. They somehow found out about Claire giving her the drug. She made sure Mrs. Martinez knew the risk, but she said she was ready for anything, as long as she could have a chance to leave the hospital. Claire lost the fight, they found her guilty and she was fired immediately after.”

“Where is she now?”

“At our apartment. She hasn’t left her room since coming home yesterday.”

“Dr. Trinh, I’ll need you to take care of my patients while I’m gone.”

“Of course, Dr. Ramsey. No problem.” Sienna smiled softly, knowing exactly what he was planning on doing.

\-----------

Twenty minutes later he was by her door. He tried knocking, ringing the bell, but she didn’t answer. His fist came into contact with the door, desperate to get her to open, to let him in.

“Claire, it’s me. Let me in, I need to talk to you.” his voice was pleading, begging.

He waited a few minutes, resting his forehead on the wooden surface, closing his eyes, the feeling of helplessness washing over him. He was about to call out again when he heard the lock turn and the door flew open, revealing Claire.

She looked devastated. Her hair on top of her head, her clothes loose on her body, her posture hunched. But what really concerned him was the look in her eyes.

They were dull, expressionless, a thick and heavy curtain of emptiness, hiding and revealing how broken she was at the same time.

“What is it, Ethan?”

“Why didn’t you come to me?”

“I did. But you slammed the door in my face before I could say anything. I know that you wanted to be alone, I get that, and I would never judge you for that. I understand that more than anyone else.”

He ran his hand over his face, the blood in his veins freezing. _That’s what she wanted to talk about that day? And he selfishly pushed her away, not stopping for even a second to take into the consideration the scared look on her face._

“Oh god, Claire, I’m so sorry…” he took a hesitant step forward, testing to see if she would let him come inside. She stepped aside, leaving enough space for him to come in. The door closed behind them, leaving them both in a closed and quiet space.

“Don’t be. There is nothing you could have done to prevent that.” She avoided looking at him, making her way to the kitchen. She took the kettle into her hands and held it up towards him, a silent question. He nodded before taking a quick look around the room.

Soon after, she brought two cups of steaming tea and placed them on the coffee table.

Claire sat down on the couch and patted the spot next to her softly. Ethan rested by her.

“Why didn’t you tell me? I know how I acted, you have no idea how ashamed I feel for locking you out like that. And right when you needed me the most. I feel like a fool…”

“Ethan, I get it. You were really busy with Naveen. And you have your own problems. You don’t need mine added into the mix.”

“Claire, you should have come to me the second something happened. _Make me listen_. You are so good at that, not taking ‘no’ for an answer. Why didn’t you tell me someone snitched on you to the family? It’s unacceptable, that, or any, form of sabotaging.”

As he said that, a dark shadow passed her face, quick and almost undetectable, but he saw it.

“You’re not telling me something. What is it?”

She tensed visibly, avoiding his eyes, afraid of his reaction to the truth she hid from him. He reached out for her hand, holding it in his delicately.

“Ever since we came back from… _Miami_…” she made a pause here, her cheeks blushing furiously at the memories. “… someone has been sabotaging me.” She proceeded to walk him through the events of the last few weeks, all the situations where the lives of her patients were endangered because of jealousy and determination to make her fail.

Ethan’s hands curled into fists, knuckles white, rage flowing through his veins.

Suddenly he felt soft touch on his left hand. Looking down he saw his hand, squeezing hers way to tightly, her thumb moving over the top of his hand in soothing circles to relieve some of the pressure.

He immediately let go, picking her palm up and bringing it closer to his face to examine the damage he made.

“I’m sorry… for everything.” He whispered, preparing himself for her rejection. But it never came.

Instead, she was still looking at him with her beautiful, green eyes.

Ethan pressed his lips to her hand softly, offering comfort, as unspoken apology.

“I’m sorry too. I don’t want you to think that I don’t trust you. it’s just that… as I said, it’s my problem and I don’t want to be a burden.” Her eyes were trained on her hands. He put his hand on her arm.

“You’re not a burden.” His words were soft and clear, just like a few nights ago at the opera.

\----------------

They spent the next thirty minutes discussing possible suspects and drinking tea. The two of them getting more and more comfortable with each other.

“I wish all of it could just end already.” She murmured suddenly, her face twisting with exhaustion. Her words were followed by silence, his thumbs tracing soft patterns on her fingers from time to time.

“It seems as though I forgot to mention that Naveen’s results have picked up slightly.” He broke the silence.

“That’s amazing, Ethan. I’m not going to give up. And I’m not going to let you give up either.” She leaned forward, placing a soft kiss in the corner of his lips, a sweet promise.

He circled her body with his arms and pulled her closer to him, hugging her tightly.

“Claire?”

“Yes?”

“We’re going to figure it out. You and me. I’ll bring you back to the hospital. I won’t give up. Not on Naveen. _Not on you_.”

She fell deeper into his arms, relaxing as they both leaned backwards, sitting more comfortably on the couch, almost laying down.

“I know. I won’t give up on you either.”

He kissed her forehead softly and put his cheek against the top of her head, nuzzling his nose into her hair, breathing her scent in. Closing his eyes for just a moment…

\--------------

A few hours later Sienna came back home, earlier than the rest of her friends.

Upon entering the room she saw two doctors, two people, sitting on the couch, sleeping.

Her legs were thrown over his, his arms protectively around her, his head on hers.

She quietly made her way towards her room, notifying the rest of her flatmates, so that they wouldn’t disturb the couple in the living room.


End file.
